NADIA LEFT HANGING ON THE UNEVEN BARS
Mike Royko.
Published: Tuesday, December 19, 1989
Section: NEWS
Page: 3

These are joyous times for America`s busy-bodies, both private and those in the news business.

For that they can thank Nadia Comaneci. It`s been a long time since this country`s moralists had a notorious home-wrecker at whom they could shake an angry finger.

We`ve become blase about such things. Unmarried movie stars live together and bear children, and it`s barely a squib in the gossip columns. Star athletes are slapped with paternity suits and receive a standing ovation the next time at bat. Talk show hosts dump wives, find new wives, or their wives dump them for tennis pros, and who cares? Only the lawyers who get the tidying-up fees.

Just the other day I read that the girlfriend of one of our most famous movie producers has become pregnant by the producer at the same time the producer`s wife is pregnant by her new boyfriend.

I haven`t seen one angry letter in a newspaper denouncing their behavior. Maybe in this case it is too difficult to keep track of who is doing it to who.

But along comes Nadia and she is being scolded on editorial pages, by sports pundits and those who write outraged letters to newspapers.

I suppose some of the anger is the result of disillusionment. Yes, it is sad but true that a 14-year-old gymnast who became the ``darling`` of the Olympic Games can grow up to become a flawed adult like the rest of us. There is more to life than the parallel bars.

And I suppose the disillusionment was heightened because the former teen gymnast escaped from Romania, still a cruel Iron Curtain country, and was welcomed as a heroine.

She was doing fine up to that point. And she would have still been in our good graces had she put on her tights and done a couple of back flips while decrying Romanian ruthlessness and singing ``God Bless America.`` She might have gone to the White House and had tea and a few photo opportunities.

Instead, she took up with her rescuer, a Romanian-born Florida roofer who looks and sounds like one of the old ``Saturday Night Live`` ``wild and crazy guys.``

Unfortunately, the roofer has a young wife and four young kids. The wife, who sounds a bit confused by this shocking turn of events, has been weeping all over TV about how Constantin, her heartless husband, has left the family without the price of a Christmas tree.

So everybody is mad at Nadia for stealing roofer Constantin Panait from Mrs. Panait and the four Panait tots. Callers to radio talk shows-that great, babbling forum of American thought-have even been demanding that the husband- stealing Nadia be shipped back to Romania.

And to the best of my knowledge, not one voice has been raised in Nadia`s defense.

Well, I am not going to defend her. But I am going to urge my fellow Americans to remain calm until all the facts are in. As our president and commander in chief might say: ``We`ve got to check that data thing.``

Yes, we do know that Nadia appears to be consorting with a married Romanian-American-Floridian roofer.

What does that tell us about her? If anything, it means she is not a skilled fortune-hunter. Not to malign roofers, but I would think that if she played it smart, she could have landed a polo player. Or at least the foreman of the roofing company.

And how do we know that this wild and crazy roofer is worth stealing in the first place? We have only his wife`s word for it. They`ve been married for a number of years, so obviously nobody else has bothered to steal him.

It could be that Nadia is suffering from the same psychological ailment that strikes many who have escaped from communist countries: trinketitis. They grab the first American trinkets they see. In this case, the trinket is a Romanian who wears his shirts open to the belly-button. The mere fact that he speaks Romanian, and Nadia`s English is limited, might be a major factor. If she knew our language, she might very well say to some other fellow: ``What you do?`` ``I am a Yuppie yacht dealer.`` ``You make more bucks than roofer?`` ``You bet I do.`` ``Goodbye, Constantin, and say hello to wife for me.``

And what about Constantin and his wife? For all we know, they have been shouting and bickering for years, disturbing the neighbors and upsetting the children. Maybe this is the best thing for them and the kids. As a wise man once said: ``You`ve got to give divorce a chance.``

Or maybe Constantin is no dummy. If he can swing some deals for Nadia- commercials, a movie, a book-he might make a bundle. After all, Hollywood hairdressers have done it, so why not a roofer? Then his wife can drag him into court and demand her cut. And she could wind up with enough money so she will never again have to worry about the stiff falling off a roof and leaving her and the family destitute.

So I think this country`s moralists have been overreacting. Nadia should be given time to get her bearings. Chances are that before long she will recognize her mistake and dump this married roofer. Maybe for an electrician. It`s year-round work.